I cannot actually believe this has happened. Schools are closed in the US, if your job is not essential, most people are working from home, and MILLIONS of Americans are on unemployment, probably the highest numbers we’ve been. Covid-19 has caused all of this and more to happen. I haven’t grocery shopped in a month. My husband, Joe has been doing all the shopping, we try to online order when we can but that’s also out of the question at times, forcing him to go to the store. I fear him catching this while I’m pregnant. It’s been a few weeks since we’ve been told to stay at home and I still can’t believe this. I am 28 weeks pregnant and it’s been quite a ride. I had a friend in Europe deliver her second baby without her husband in the hospital. I asked my doctor if I delivered if I’d be able to have my husband, so far they are allowing one person in the room. If I were to test positive for this virus while giving birth, they would take my baby and not let me hold, breastfeed but I could pump for my baby. My last two children were born in flu season, so I’ve been used to restrictions but not like this. This is different, this is sad, especially for new moms who are experiencing this as their first pregnancy. I can’t imagine having more anxiety then I already have. This is my third child, I know what to expect although anything can happen in that hospital room when it’s time I know I have done it twice so I might be ok delivering alone with the doctor and nurses if I needed to. I know so many women that cancelled their baby showers because we cannot have get together right now. At one point we didn’t have enough ventilators for people and it is what was keeping people alive from this virus. How could the united states of America not provide enough medical supplies? With our technology, with our modern medicine, we were NOT prepared and it’s sad. I’m sad that so many people died from this, I’m sad that my kids don’t understand what is happening and why their world has been turned upside down. So far, we’ve been lucky. I have listening to the rules, even before it really hit I started keeping my kids away from play areas, large public places like libraries which we love and should never have to fear going to. The flu was hitting for it’s second strain and I was nervous. My daughter has asthma, and when she gets sick, it’s VERY difficult and I feel awful for her. This has been a rough few months, we have hope we are hearing some states are opening up again, but it’s still scary, we fear it will come back in fall and it’s still not completley done. There are plenty of companies working on vaccines but it won’t happen for at least a year we believe. And even then, it would be such a new vaccine there are so many questions that we would all have. Pandemics are life changing and it is something we will never forget.
I debated if I wanted to blog about this, I debated if I wanted to title my post miscarriage. It’s a word noone wants to say, it’s something no one wants to go through but it happens. It happens ALOT more then it should. I just had my second. Joe and I were discussing if we wanted to try for another baby and he wanted to wait a year, I didn’t agree. I want all my babies to grow up together because that’s what I had envisioned. One morning, I decided to take a test and it came out positive. I couldn’t believe it, I was beyond excited. We decided not to tell the kids and it was really hard. But in the end, I was happy we didn’t tell them. We only told some of our family about it, and we kept it from our friends. After having one miscarriage you tend to be really nervous, they say its best to wait until your 13-15 weeks so share the news because chances of a miscarriage go down. When your going through something like this there are so many things you don’t want to hear. Someone very close to me said, “you were blessed with two kids so your very lucky” like I should stop there. It completely hurt me. Yes, I am lucky to have my two kids but at that particular moment as I’m literally going through it, I don’t need to hear that. I’m a human, not a robot I have feelings and I am allowed to feel the way I feel. There are so many women out there that have their own stories, there are so many women out there still fighting to have their first baby. Don’t give up, research, find a doctor, change your diet, explore other options if it’s really what you want but don’t forget to live your life.
Being a host is fun and STRESSFUL! I love when everything is perfect just like everyone else, but that just isn’t reality. Yes, you need to be prepared but you also need to have fun. People sense your stress, especially your kiddos! I need to remember this always. Things that help me throw a fun party is:
- Pick a theme- This is key. It’s really a starting point for your entire party. I always try to buy my decor weeks before a party, so I don’t feel super overwhelmed because you have to purchase all the food and drinks right before the party.
- You should have everything prepped BEFORE people arrive. I always try to have snacks cut up, everything refrigerated beforehand, juices and waters out or readily available to guests. When everyone is arriving, just shoutout drinks are in the fridge, my husband is constantly asking if anyone wants anything to drink, it’s cute. Crockpots are AWESOME for keeping things warm. I once had a taco party I had ground beef taco meat in the crock, guests even made nachos. It was easy and delicious. I changed it up because we always do pizza.
- Activities. Have something to do for the kids, this is HUGE. If kids are bored the house gets trashed. This is real, the older kids will start saying they are bored or start just taking toys out because they need an acivity. I always do freeze dance, all kids love this. Put music on and have someone in charge of it, the adults like to watch their littles dance. It is CUTE. I try to save this acivity for before and after the cake. Get that sugar rush out. I offer prizes because let’s get real, who doesn’t love prizes!? The kids get SO excited for play, I totally bribe. I like doing Pin the tail on the whatever your theme is. This is nice, because even the super little guys can do this. There are a TON of games I usually look up on pintrest. If it’s a summer party, there are even more options because you can do so much more with water. I am also super traditional and always have a pinata! It is truly the best part of a party for me. I love seeing the kids go crazy! Coloring is awesome, I almost always have this out for them to do on a kids table. Taking out a car track and setting it up with a ton of cars for the littles to play too is great. Crafts are awesome but having an adult to help at the table is a must or it gets too messy. Kids parties should be fun and entertainig, it is a kids party so have fun with it!
- Food is important. The meal, and snacks! Always snacks. If you want to save a little money, have your parents bring something. This is a big deal for me. My in laws and my parents always help and it’s amazing.
- beverages for adults. No hard liquor but beer and wines are ok.
- Put away special toys your kids don’t want to share.
- Clean up before you go to bed, not every single thing but try you’ll feel better in the morning. And if guests, or family memebers want to help you let them
It’s almost the fourth of July. We have three parties for this holiday this year, and none of it is with our family. We are ok with that, we love our family but we like to spend time with friends too. Afterall, the bigger holidays like Thanksgiving and Christmas are defintley days with our family. Joe and I both come from a huge family, and now most of us have kids so it’s even bigger. Joe has three sisters, I have two brothers and one sister. On the third we have a party in the city, we are from a suburb in Chicago and it is far from the city. And much much different. We live in a small town, but I do love the City. It’s loud, it’s busy, it’s Chicago. I am actually planning on heading to the City sometime earlier in the day since we don’t go out there much. Maybe do a doughnut shop since we will be with the kids. Chicago has SO MUCH GOOD FOOD. Another day, we have a second birthday to our good friends babygirl. The kids always have fun with them, they have two kids pretty close in age to Vida and Nico so it’s always fun for them. The adults also have fun, we always have wine and beer to help us out. But we drink responsibliy at least one of us has to drive home! I’m a freak about this, when I was younger I didn’t always make the best choices but I’m an adult, and I have kids. Shit happens, so it’s defintley important to have a designted driver! This brings me to the next thing we are doing for the fourth, I told Joe we had three parties this week-end and we decided to stay “home” for the fourth. I want to be able to make a corny fourth of July dessert with Vida, she loves baking with me. I want to be able to drink a couple special mommy drinks, but let’s get real my tolerence is horrible I have two glasses of wine and I’m “LIT”. But at least we’ll be home and I’ll be able to play outside with the kids, water ballons, water table, music and I won’t have to drive anywhere. At night we have two options for fireworks super close to home, like 5 mins. Sometimes, after having such a crazy busy fun week-end we prefer to stay close to home. I have light up wands for the babies, flags, cute outfits for the kiddos, and sparklers! Which is a must for me ever since I was little. Lastly, we have a party Sunday afternoon, another friends house which we adore. They always have stuff for the kids to do, they know how to keep them busy which is always super important at parties so they aren’t tearing their house apart. As always, we are so blessed and grateful to be invited to our friends festivities! I also love hosting bbqs and playdates which will be my next post!
Usually, I like waiting for the entire house to be quiet to write. Babies asleep for the night, dog walked, dishes done, mama in her jammies. But tonight, I am SO excited that I got my android phone back that I had to blog about it. That’s right girls, I have an android and I love it. Joe brought me over to the dark side as he calls it. I used to be an apple girl but my husband surprised me with a new phone and ever since I have loved it. I am promising myself I’m never going back.
Sunday Fundays are seriously my favorite. I used to day drink on patios, take afternoon naps and do take out for dinner. I said USED to. Today, my view right now, is my son in his undies because he’s currently being potty trained. My daughter is pooping in the bathroom with her tablet, and I’m getting a few minutes of peace. My husband is currently picking up playdoh because it is everywhere. We went to see a movie as a family and it was great, we did late lunch, picked up my fixed phone (totally cracked my screen at target a few weeks ago, like I didn’t spend enough money there I cracked my damn phone screen too), and finally picked up cupcakes from Jewel for my daughters class since her birthday is this week. Now, I’m just counting the time until we the kids go to bed so I can put on netflix and have a cup of tea before Monday starts. Sunday Funday sure is different then it was when I was 20, but I would not change a thing.
Before I had kids, I never thought sleeping would be a huge part of being a mother. Four years ago, I had my first. Mi Vida, my life. I was so paranoid of her not breathing at night or if I fell in a deep sleep that I wouldn’t hear her. I began safe co sleeping. It is not for everyone, and that’s ok. I will always say some things that work for me, will not work for others, and that’s ok. Breastfeeding at first, was exhausting because she woke up so often during the night to nurse. When she was a few weeks old, is when I decided to try co sleeping. I read the rules for safe co sleeping. Kellymom has always been my go to. https://kellymom.com/parenting/nighttime/cosleeping/. My main rules are no heavy blankets, firm mattress, baby on their back, the only pillow I had was my own, and I wore a robe because I like keeping my room cool. To this day, I have a mama robe 🙂 I also always wore my hair up because I had it really long. When Vida started rolling I decided we needed a bed rail because our bed was high. A lot of people even decide to put their mattresses on the floor, but I opted for the bed rail. For me, it was well worth it because I also used it for my second.
Now for the hard part, deciding when it’s time to have your toddler sleep in their own room or bed, or like Vida both! We recently had a big move, she was so used to sleeping in my room and in my bed. I first let her sleep in her toddler bed next to my bed. When I make changes, I like to make them in steps. I have high anxiety and I like to slow transition because I feel like we ALL do better that way. When we first moved, I let her sleep in my bed and told her she can go in her bed too if she choose. I gave her the option. Bedding they like is a pretty big deal, Vida loved her peppa pig bedding her abuelo bought her. She also LOVES stuffed animals, which I feel like her stuffies need a blog post of their own. We began laying with Vida in her bed until she would fall asleep. Sometimes, it was great she wouldnt get up and if she was tired she would usually fall asleep pretty quickly. Dont get my wrong some days, she wasn’t tired but mommy wanted a glass of wine or a shower or both. Those were the hard days, I would get so frustrated and sometimes fall asleep before her. Now, those days are over, for now. I made a sticker chart for her and I owe her a max from secret life of pets dog because she actually slept in her bed alone for the past two weeks! Yes, she gets up sometimes but I always explain things to her and how things need to be. She’s four, she comptley understands almost everything we say. I also told her Nico, her brother goes to sleep in his bed too (she doesn’t know that he sneaks into my bed at night) and if something is ever wrong she knows exatly where to find me. My bedroom. We read a book, she has her favorite blankets, stuffies, curtains closed and lights out. If your child is older then 4 and your co sleeping, you need to do what works for YOU. Some kids aren’t ready yet, sometimes we aren’t ready yet. But we were both pretty ready because it came pretty natural to her, besides her and I LOVE our space. It’s like the end of a breastfeeding journey with your baby, BITTERSWEET. Oh, and she brings 5 toys into bed with me at 6:30am she’s my alarm.
So who takes care of mama when she’s sick? Today, Vida (she’s 4) woke up in the morning and gave me pretend food and said “Mommy I made it for you since your sick”. It’s almost 2 PM and my husband didn’t even ask me if I was feeling better. My husband works from home a lot, but it doesn’t make it any easier for me. I’m not complaining that he works from home, but he REALLY works. He has to, being a sick SAHM is so hard because I don’t have anywhere to take the kids, since I am their school, and their daycare. Here are some tips to make life a little easier when we aren’t feeling our best.
1] Take meds! If you really need it, take day time medicine. It will help a ton, till your husband can take over or at least help out. If your a single mama, ask someone to help you out when they are done with work; neighbors you trust, friends
2] Do grocery pick up so you have plenty of easy snacks for the kids to grab themselves if they are old enough. We have an awesome Wal mart that I do all my grocery pick up from. I usually do it the night before on my phone, and pick it up early the next morning without getting my kids out of my car. It’s LIFE CHANGING.
3] GET REST; right now my 2 year old Nico is asleep, Vida is watching netflix quietly. I can’t nap because I drank a massive iced coffee, and now I’m on my afternoon coffee. But at least I’m lying down writing and I went to bed early last night!
4] If you feel up for it, let the kids play outside for a bit. It was raining all morning, and all we did today was pick up groceries. So my kids needed a little outside time. We all put our rain boots on and they spalashed in puddles, and mud. They LOVED it.
5] EAT! I didn’t really feel hungry today but I need energy to keep up with these monkeys so I’ve eaten 3 small meals so far today.
FEEL BETTER MAMA!!! And remember if your really miserable, don’t feel guilty if you put on the tv to help you out for a little bit! You need to get better and be healthy, for yourself and for your babies!